You'd probably agree that men are guilty when it comes to leaving most of the house chores to their wives. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. So during those times a man is deprived from intimatemarital relations if he only has one wife, especially if he is young and has strong desires. According to Islamic legislation, Muslim men can marry four women. The principles of Islam have also been framed in such a way that man can comply In monogamous relationships, an only child may only get to mingle with other kids and learn social skills when they get to school or other external playgroups. Not that this scenario can't happen in monogamy. The disadvantage of living in an extended type of family is shouldering more expenses for their basic needs. In most cases, the objective is achieved through monogamy. As a woman, you naturally have a limited number of children you can give birth to in one lifetime. In fact, if you are in a polygamous marriage, you can have multiple partners at the same time without being accused of cheating. Having Varieties: when there is multiple partners you have different varieties. But there is only one condition: the husband is totally responsible for all his wives. So, if you are wondering what polygamy feels like, perhaps you are considering the idea of being the new wife to an already married man, or your husband is making new marriage plans with another woman. Third theme: The coping strategies used by polygamous women have included faith in religion, fate role, and compromise It is a matter of Pride, Piety. In fact, many people underestimate the costs related to polygamy and are surprised of how expensive it can be to have multiple partners. the time he stays and the money he spends. In such a situation, a woman can allow her husband to marry another woman to enable them have children. So, with the multiple options available in polygamy, the chances of getting bored are lower. With little to lose or look forward to, these frustrated men are much more likely to turn to crime and violence, including sexual violence and warmongering. Your children will get to grow up in an environment with a greater connection with more children. 2. The glory of his piety is stained by his departure from God and his duty, in his latter days, marrying strange wives and worshipping strange gods, 1 Kgs. Bear in mind that not all polygamy arrangement translates to the spouses living under one roof with the guy. New types of malignancies that were not seen or rarely seen before; are now diagnosed daily e.g. Naturally, humans are a variety-loving species, which makes cheating on our spouses an easy option as continuous monotony is a problem for us. Position One: Islam restricts or forbids polygyny. Older women (usually post-30s), divorcees (or widows) [read on], In the name of Allah, Most Merciful, Bestower of Mercy. That said, polygyny remains very common across much of West Africa. When this reality sets in, it can make someone feel miserable, unhappy, and depressed, which may affect one's mental health. Gang leaders and warlords attract new recruits with the promise of a bride or an offer to cover their brideprice. 6 So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord; he did not follow the Lord completely, as David his father had done. While the idea of a one-man/one-wife marriage makes better sense, it's not uncommon to find an adult woman without a guy. Polygamy is also practiced in modern America, Africa and Melanesia. Religious doctrines, modern laws over the years contributed to the shift from polygamy to monogamy. Do you think polygamy and arranged marriage would help to lower the divorce rate in our society today? Polygyny also tends to disadvantage the offspring. Shaikh Ibn `Uthaimeen (rahimahullh) said: There is not in the [read on]. People who have multiple partners have a lower incentive to cheat on their partners. In Europe, this was generally achieved through the feudal rule of primogeniture (first born), still practised among the British aristocracy, by which the eldest legitimate son inherits the entire estate (or almost) of both his parents. She is treated like a shameful creature who must be hidden away only of use for sexual gratification whilst the wife is deceived into thinking that her husband is loyal and loving! Household tension may be relatively higher, 26. Polygamy is the concept that people can be married to more than one partner. Furthermore, polygamy helps in the expansion of man's gene pool, the reduction of boredom, and offers the excitement that comes with being sexually active with multiple women yet, technically, not hurt their feelings. What's more, when there are scenarios of financial challenges, the polygamy-established home may be relatively harder to manage since there's more financial obligation. 5. Therefore, it's not uncommon for arguments to erupt when a man isn't getting enough intimate time with his wife. The men enjoy having multiple options, and the wives enjoy financial support and a family relationship that comes from being married. Polyandry is typically tied to scarcity of land and resources, as, for example, in certain parts of the Himalayas, and serves to limit population growth. Younger wives may add to the status and standing of the first wife, while at the same time subtracting from her responsibilities. In places where polygamy is technically legal or allowed, there are usually no laws that accommodate the splitting of properties when divorce scenarios come up. However, most people in a marriage get bored over time and urgently want to experience something new. Assalmu alaikum. In fact, if you are in a polygamous marriage, you can have multiple partners at the same time without being accused of cheating. Monogamy is by far the norm in Muslim societies, as most men cannot afford to maintain more than one family, and many of those who could would rather not. Another survey shows that adultery is as common among Christians as non-Christians. As mentioned earlier, the new spouse can be at another location or under one roof as it is practiced in many African countries. So some Muslims speak with the arguments of the Christians claiming that polygyny is oppressive towards women. Furthermore, it could mean negative financial consequences for her and her children, especially in cases of separation. Clear lines of inheritance: Patriline. This resulted in a very civilized relationship between husband and wife in Islam. Polygamy is an ancient custom. Its the only accepted form of polygamy. So it is not correct that he remains for the rest of his life being forbidden from having more children, and forbidden from enjoyment of intimacy. In turn, other men often want to be like this guy and the men that have multiple wives will often be the most respected men in those societies. *Note: Later the People of the Book (Jews and Christians) maligned this noble Prophet of God and altered the scriptures, accusing Prophet Solomon of evil and transgression. According to Allah in the Holly Quran! It was practiced by people in all parts of the world. Polygamous households also tend to have many children. This is not the case in reality at all! There's no subtle way to put it in this pros and cons article; most women in polygamous relationships or families are only doing a great job hiding how they truly feel. Advantages of polygamy can be that stereotypical 'female' roles can be shared. The advantages of polygamy were included sharing in-house responsibilities and child-rearing. PostedJanuary 4, 2018 If you have more than one marriage partner, you can easily choose who to be with at a particular time. Again, in Africa, many women with children from a previous marriage or relationship often consider polygamy as it does not only offer them financial support, but it also gives them a sense of being part of a family instead of being alone as getting married can be a little challenging with extra "baggage.". Your kids might have a hard time understanding why his or her family is different from other families. Studying the vast and complicated world of relationships entices me, and I am constantly striving to learn more, so I can then help others with more knowledge and experience. Now, I'm not trying to use this point to justify adultery or promote polygamy, but let's face it, the alarming rate of divorce proves that the soulmate ideology is laughable. This situation is not because she chose the path of being single for life or became a widow, but its just that she has been unlucky. In fact, if you have a big selection of different partners, you will not feel too much urge to go out and to cheat on your partners. The women's ways of coping included the use of religion, faith and a strong sisterly bond formed with the co-wives. Any children born from an adulterous relationship are quite often shunned having no rights. As for a man, then his desires do not fade away and his sexual strength and preparedness for women remains into old age. Fragile-States Index 2017. Ahlan is a non-profit foundation that aims to clear misconceptions by spreading knowledge. With monogamy, a man with an excellent gene, for example, a genius gene, may never pass that gene to his progeny since the number of children in monogamous settings is usually few. Read also However, these options aren't easy for women in many locations of the world like Africa. If it involves several brothers married to the one wife (fraternal polyandry), it also protects the familys land from division. Essay on polygamy is better than monogamy. With effective communication, agreement, and zero jealousy, a man and woman can remain married while the celibate partner allows her husband to take another wife he can be sexually active with. The Fund for Peace; DHS; MICS. Like I said earlier, having many spouses is technically a symbol of being rich as such a man must have attained a level of financial stability. What's interesting is that the wives of such alpha males are also placed on the same pedestal society places their husbands, so both husbands and wives sometimes enjoy the praise that comes from polygamy. That said, polygyny remains very common . It's a cultural/ traditional practice that is widely accepted. Recommended: Advantages and Disadvantages of an Extended Family. Another problem with polygamy is that you will also need a bigger home in order to accommodate all of your spouses. Networks and connections to different people are quite important to succeed in various parts of life. According to genetic studies, it is only relatively recently, about 10,000 years ago, that monogamy began to prevail over polygamy in human populations. Answer (1 of 2): Patrilineal descent is a system of tracing descent through the male line, in which children are considered to belong to the same descent group as their father. Research shows that humans are polygamous in nature, and that includes men and women. Being many may cause the man to have little or no reason to compromise. It shows that marriages that work only do so because of a conscious effort to stay together from both parties. When parting with one, there are still others. However, it's the culture in many locations such as Africa and the Middle East. By nature, polygamy encourages gender inequality, which often leads to trampling upon the rights of the women in the marriage. Even in this modern age, where gender inequality is being frowned upon, many domestic chores are still classified as feminine things. Some of them have three rights [upon you]: the right of Islam, the right of neighborhood, and the right of relationship. Instead of divorcing each other, the guy can have another spouse who wants children. Of course, man's rights have been also remembered. Most importantly, it is a matter of Pride, Piety, maintaining a clear pure lineage of children, keeping proper kinship, and having natural healthy family life for the upbringing of new generations. On the contrary, Islam has some reasons why it allows polygamy, such as assert woman's rights, her right for married, make a family, have and raise their children. 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